He Does She Does

A lot of guys feel that to enhance the sexual desires by being part of a swingers group, however most groups require you to be a part of a couple or in some cases it’s ok to go along if you are a female.

He Doe want to be part of a swingers group where he can have sex with other women. She Does feel a little bit apprehensive and doesn’t want to be pushed, or She Does feel the need enjoy the extra attention from other men and possibly women and He Does get a little jealous when other men have sex with his wife…

Read on and take note with these all-important notes on swinging in He Does She Does.

If there were one fantasy that is shared by almost every man on the planet it would be the thought of swinging. It seems that every guy at some time in his life entertains the thought of sharing his partner with other guys while at the same time he enjoys sex with those other guys’ partners.

Some guys only dream of it and enjoy the vicarious pleasure that only a secret fantasy can bring. Others actually make the step from fantasy to reality and live their fantasy and still others want to move into reality but just don’t know how to go about it.

It’s interesting to note that many people once they have tried swinging ultimately decide that it wasn’t all they thought it would be and don’t continue on with it while for others it becomes a lifestyle full of fun and excitement.

Let’s look at some ways of making that leap from fantasy to hardcore reality and consider some of the reasons why some people find that they don’t enjoy it quite as much as they thought they would.

First let me say that, while swingers groups can be found just about everywhere, they tend to keep a low profile because there are still many people who feel that swinging is just not socially acceptable That means that actually finding a group in your area can be a little difficult.

Some groups do place discreet ads in their local newspapers but few advertise on a regular basis. One group that I was involved with would only place a very small ad in the adult section of the classifieds a week before the group was going to get together.

Other groups are invitation only and they never advertise. Couples are usually encouraged to attend by other group members and outsiders will rarely hear anything but rumors of groups like that.

And there is the word that stops many guys in their tracks when they try to join a swingers group, ‘couples’. It is very rare for a swingers group to ever be open to single guys. Single girls don’t have a problem but single guys are rarely welcome simply because any group that does accept single guys quickly becomes swamped with men.

That doesn’t mean that swinging is out for single guys, there are some commercial venues that do encourage single guys and I’ll mention a few of those at the end. But to access the more private swingers groups you really do need to be part of a couple.

Of course that opens the way to yet another problem. You want to swing but does your partner? Many women are not receptive to any suggestion of swinging and there are many reasons for that.

Your partner may simply not be interested in having sex with other men. She has one partner and that is all she wants in life. If that is the case then you really must respect her wishes. Forcing her, either directly or with mind games, into doing something she does not want to do will only lead to disaster and turning fantasy into reality becomes turning fantasy into a nightmare.

Your partner may find the prospect of swinging to be quite exciting but she may have personal image problems that prevent her from ever doing anything like that. She may feel that she can’t compete with all the attractive babes she thinks hang out in swingers groups.

If that is the case then talk about the possibility of finding a group that has social evenings for new members. The first group that my partner and I attended ran social evenings and I found that getting together for drinks at a bar was a great way of breaking the ice.

I found that the other women were just ordinary girls, no more and no less attractive than me, and that helped me feel very comfortable and willing to go further. I was also surprised to find that the guys thought I was just as attractive as the others and a trip to the bar with two of them to order drinks turned into a pleasant little grope session.

How do you actually start a conversation with your partner about swinging? Look for an intimate moment, a suggestion of something naughty or cheeky and move on from there. Stress that you want to do it together and it is to be something that you both can enjoy.

It is also worthwhile to point out the social aspects of swinging and the new friendships that can be developed.

Never suggest to your partner that you want to try swinging for some excitement because the first thing that will suggest to her is that you are bored with her. That will raise her insecurity levels to the point where she won’t consider swinging at all.

There is one other reason why your partner may reject the suggestion that you become swingers. She just may know you better than you know yourself. Be realistic here for a moment. How would you really feel if you had to watch your partner getting gang-banged by a group of well-hung men and she was very obviously enjoying it?

Of course, right now you’re going to dismiss that as being of no consequence at all but is it? Think about it, for years she has been faithful to you and you have had an adequate sex life. Now suddenly you’re watching while she is screaming her head off in an orgasm the likes of which you have never been able to give her.

Would you really be comfortable with that?

There is a fine line between a pleasurable reality and a horrible nightmare and jealousy is something that can help you across that line very quickly. So think about it even before you suggest it to your partner and think about it with your brain rather than through the end of your cock.

The other thing to consider when it comes to swinging is sexual health. It may not be exciting and it may not give you a hard-on but you really do need to consider the fact that if you join a swingers group you will be having sex with total strangers and you just don’t know where they have been or who they have had sex with.

There are groups out there that do not practice safe sex and do not require guys to wear condoms. It really is up to you but my advice would be to have nothing to do with groups like that. The risks and dangers are simply too great and nothing can end a beautiful sex life faster than a sexually transmitted disease.

So, if you’re still interested and you want to learn more and have some places on the net that you can take your partner to if she wants to find out more, check out these links.

Wherever you are in the world you should find something listed in your country at The Swinger’s Internet Guide and you can find the guide at:

<http://www.pvwebsex.com/swingers/isgwarn.htm>

If you are looking for swingers’ personals, you can try Pleasant Vices, which you can find on the welcome page at pvwebsex.com

The Swingers Board is another great place for everything involved in the lifestyle. You can find the board at Swingersboard.com

The Couples Club in Sydney has a website - Swingers.com.au - it does cater for single guys and it has a free newsletter that you should find interesting.

The Paradise Club in Sydney cityswingers.net also has an interesting site with some great links.

As you surf those sites and maybe even post on the boards just remember that they are open to everyone. There are people out there who lurk on those boards with a view to ripping off genuine swingers. A couple I know of had to deal with a blackmail attempt after they posted their details and several photos.

As with all things, exercise caution and discretion. Swinging can be the most erotic experience if you are careful and that is what life is all about, having fun but staying safe.

On that note to all readers of He Does She Does, remember sometimes fantasies can come true… and when it comes to swinging, He Does She Does recommends joint decisions when it comes to swinging. Check out the social groups before hand if feeling a little apprehensive. Apart from anything else their nights are a lot of fun when it comes to socializing first.